Keebles World

Being in the healthcare industry, although low down on the "essential healthcare workers totem pole", it made me eligible for the vaccine waiting list. I figured it would be a couple of weeks, if not a month or two before I would be called up, but I literally got a call within 20 minutes of signing up! Apparently, the essential, essential workers are all either too scared of the vaccine, or have political beliefs that make them (and yes, I'm going here, this is, after all, a very dominant red state), too stupid to take it. Oh well, better for us further down the lines and it keeps the current batches from expiring without being used. Today was my day. I made sure to let them know I was allergic to the flu shot, had asthma, etc, etc. They kept me an extra amount of time to watch me, but I had no reaction whatsoever! It was a VERY tiny needle, didn't hurt at all and, at least so far, I have no reactions other than I feel a bit sleepy (and almost feel a bit drunk...

Yes, I actually stitched yesterday! And not just for two hours either, almost ALL day! Granted, it was very slow going, but at least it was something. Now, my "brain" says that I'm going to go home early every day this week and continue on, but I know my "body" probably will leave late and sit on the couch and do nothing. I will fight that urge though and see how far she goes before the end of the year. I did switch out Alice and the B's, because I definitely wasn't feeling them, so I picked up Snow White, my least favorite fabric'ed project in my entire collection, but one of my favorite (and oldest) patterns in rotation. I left off on her here last January (damn!): And, on Sunday, like I said, didn't get very far, but at least this far with some more hair and outside work: If I can continue on, the goal is to get more into her face before the end of the year. I need to do a final tally at my paultry work for the year, and then put ...

I'm not going to TTT this one because it's not directly therapy-related but, in case I don't have a chance before the new year, I just wanted to look back a bit at the crap-show that was 2020 as briefly as I can and hopefully put out good vibes for 2021 (damn that useless hope gene of mine). I didn't stitch as much as I wanted to (obviously). There were days at work it was all I thought about, but by the time I got home, I just couldn't bring myself to do it. Before Hotel Calfornia, my brain would go silent when I stitched. I could have the TV on in the background and just focus on the pattern and my hand movements while I watched the TV. But this year more than the past three, my brain just won't shut the hell up! I have stitched, but rarely ever, and usually only for a couple of hours at a time. I hope to do better next year, but no promises. I told the therapist this is a priority for me. I need my stitchy mojo back. I didn't make a gingerbrea...

Firstly, I'm obviously still going to post cross stitch stuff (whenever I stitch, which seems to be getting less and less...I'm TRYING to work on that too with the therapist), but I've kind of decided to take my blog in a bit of a different direction, at least for a while. I've decided to share some of my trauma therapy tidbits with you guys. Obviously, I get it if you don't want to read or comment, you don't have to. Some of this might be too personal for the faint of heart, or you just might not care (and god forbid if the people mentioned below read this, I'll never hear the end of it!). I'm not going to share everything we deal with (that would be Harry Potter-esque), but when important area of interest comes up, I think this could be cathardic. Besides, you guys know me, there isn't much of my life I haven't blurted out over the years here, so I don't have many secrets left anyway. I will start each post with a TTT (Trauma Therapy ...

Today at work, my phone went off for the umptenth time with a spam call. As per usual, I just stopped the ringer, but this location caught my eye...Osawatomie, Kansas. I was all like, "Seriously? Is that a real place?". So, I Google mapped the town and it WAS! Not only that, but it's where John Brown is from! Being from the South (and being old), there was a VERY racist song that was, for some reason, very acceptable to teach kids in the 70's, so that song IMMEDIATELY popped in my head when I saw the words "John Brown" and I could NOT get it out. I was mad at myself then. I just had to remind myself that Osawatomie sounds like Pasamaquadie from Pete's Dragon and remember that song, and I was good (although typing it now, here we go again). But I glanced up to the top of the town and I saw Asylum Bridge and my brain suddenly got all excited! I have seen this on YouTube hundreds of times! Urban explorers LOVE that place, but they don't talk...

Seriously, the WORST therapy I have ever done and, unfortunately, now I'm so screwed up, I have to keep doing it now! UGH! Next time I even mention the idea of therapy, one of you guys drive to my house and just shoot me!! Thankfully, my insurance is going to cover more of it than I thought, so I might get more sessions than I thought I would. Now I have to decide whether to continue on with the Asper girl, or let that one go. She has made a massive mess after all. My brain is just so fried from that trauma session. This girl at least read my previous notes and was prepared, but the only thing I really got out of it was, "well, you have been so high functioning your entire life when you are NOT a high-functioning Asper, and technically, you need to get used to calling yourself Autistic, since that is what you technically are, so if you're unable to keep up the facade of normalcy anymore, then that's OK because you shouldn't be able to do 90% of what you are...

Last night, when I left work super early (because everyone and everything was pissing me off to the point I couldn't function), my car took a while to start. That's new. After I got home, I waited about four hours, went outside and it started right up, so I just figured maybe my keys were just buried too deep in my numerous coat pockets (because it's 30 degrees here and I HATE the cold!). But this morning, same thing, only worse. So, despite the fact that I already had one doctor texting me from the hospital (that I can't go to because of my personal issues that very few are aware of) that he's having issues and he wants me to go over there first (and today is my intern's day off, so I couldn't send him), I decided, instead, to drive my vehicle to the dealership. My rationale (purely self-serving) was that, if I did go to that hospital, I could get stuck in the parking lot and it wouldn't start at all, and then I would have to get a tow truck, whic...