Updates, IHSW, & TUSAL
Here we go with a combo post, frankly because I'm too lazy to split these up.
I'm two weeks into my new job and I have yet to work less than a 12 hour day (so NOT according to plan). But boy has EVERYTHING changed! I'm even more stressed out now, but it is such a good kind of stress! I leave everyday with such a sense of accomplishment! I also haven't had a headache in two weeks (and yes, I'm sure I just jinxed myself).
It hasn't been all wine and roses though. My old co-worker took on the transcription part of my job, she's doing it all by herself now. Problem with that is, when she's off, I still have to cover her. Needless to say, she was off last Thursday and Friday and it made for some incredibly hairy moments. It was even way too much for me and I snapped at people who kept bothering me (alot apparently, I heard my name and "bitch" mentioned in the same sentence quite a few times...gotta love the supersonic hearing and heightened senses that comes with Asperger's!).
But all the trauma of the past couple of days managed to scale me over a giant wall I've been ramming my head against for the past couple of weeks. I've been bogged down by this feeling of something akin to guilt by the fact that the docs didn't hire someone to try to replace me, they just divided all my other work up between several others. I've watched these people becoming more and more stressed as the days have gone by, especially since they keep insisting on coming into my new pretty office to dump their crap about how horrible work is for them now, how A is doing more work than B, it's all my fault because I took on too much responsibility in the first place, yada yada yada...blaa blaa blaa.
I may have been "rude" (someone else's word, not mine) to people both Thursday and Friday (but that's nothing new so why it was surprising I have no clue), but the utter lack of respect I was shown just made me see that all this "emotion" I've been feeling (be it guilt or something else) has been wasted on those that don't deserve it. They whine and bitch and blame, but still expect me to do the double-load and manage their lives at the same time. Suck it up and take it people...you are many, I was one and I handled everything just fine all by myself for not only the past two work days, but for the past 17 years. The only thing I feel now is sorry for the next co-worker that comes into my office to whine!
Oh, and P.S., when you piss me off, don't come into my office 10 minutes later to tell me how mean I was and expect me to be all calm and rational and apologize. I won't be over it in 10 days, let alone 10 minutes and, after all this time, these people should know that. What part of "leave me the fuck alone so I can get this mountain of work done" wasn't clear the first 5 times I told them? Expect on time 6 to get a new asshole chewed! If you don't respect me, how in the hell do you expect me to respect you by being civil?
On the diet front, I also really haven't lost any more weight in the past couple of weeks, but we've had all kinds of food events at work and I still haven't had the time to exercise. Come hell or high water tho, tomorrow I'm gettin on the bloody treadmill!!
On the International Hermit And Stitch weekend front...gosh am I completely ashamed! I stitched through about two episodes of Downton Abbey tonight and that's all! It's definitely my worst IHSW yet. But when you are working on a project you're not really into (especially one you have already done once), it's hard to keep at it. I'd like to say I accomplished a ton of other stuff instead, but that would be a lie. I played apps all day Saturday while finishing up series 3 of the Vampire Diaries, and today T and I went and saw Nemo in 3-D. But here is the sad fruits of my non-productive labor:
As far as my Tusal goes, I can't remember what last month's looked like, so if this one was different, I would be surprised. But here it is anyway, placed on the free framed pin set I got from buying a Disney gift card:
I have managed to get caught up on everyone's blogs (although I didn't post comments because I have been reading for several hours and I'm a pooped pup). These new work hours suck! Normally this time of night I'd normally still be at work, only to come home in a couple of hours and stitch like crazy till the sun came up. Now, I'm nodding off as I'm typing. How people get up in the morning to go to work will always baffle me. Give me a night shift anytime!
And that's about it for now! I am determined to start my new Disney OCD planning series next week (along with my own preparations for my October trip, which I am ashamedly behind on). We'll see how it all goes! Let's just hope I managed to make enough people hate me last week that I'm finally left alone this week! Hate is an emotion they can throw at me all day long, I can just put up the walls and shut them down completely. It's the easiest energy to block (love being the hardest). They are just spoiling their own vibe by filling it with useless negativity.
I'm two weeks into my new job and I have yet to work less than a 12 hour day (so NOT according to plan). But boy has EVERYTHING changed! I'm even more stressed out now, but it is such a good kind of stress! I leave everyday with such a sense of accomplishment! I also haven't had a headache in two weeks (and yes, I'm sure I just jinxed myself).
It hasn't been all wine and roses though. My old co-worker took on the transcription part of my job, she's doing it all by herself now. Problem with that is, when she's off, I still have to cover her. Needless to say, she was off last Thursday and Friday and it made for some incredibly hairy moments. It was even way too much for me and I snapped at people who kept bothering me (alot apparently, I heard my name and "bitch" mentioned in the same sentence quite a few times...gotta love the supersonic hearing and heightened senses that comes with Asperger's!).
But all the trauma of the past couple of days managed to scale me over a giant wall I've been ramming my head against for the past couple of weeks. I've been bogged down by this feeling of something akin to guilt by the fact that the docs didn't hire someone to try to replace me, they just divided all my other work up between several others. I've watched these people becoming more and more stressed as the days have gone by, especially since they keep insisting on coming into my new pretty office to dump their crap about how horrible work is for them now, how A is doing more work than B, it's all my fault because I took on too much responsibility in the first place, yada yada yada...blaa blaa blaa.
I may have been "rude" (someone else's word, not mine) to people both Thursday and Friday (but that's nothing new so why it was surprising I have no clue), but the utter lack of respect I was shown just made me see that all this "emotion" I've been feeling (be it guilt or something else) has been wasted on those that don't deserve it. They whine and bitch and blame, but still expect me to do the double-load and manage their lives at the same time. Suck it up and take it people...you are many, I was one and I handled everything just fine all by myself for not only the past two work days, but for the past 17 years. The only thing I feel now is sorry for the next co-worker that comes into my office to whine!
Oh, and P.S., when you piss me off, don't come into my office 10 minutes later to tell me how mean I was and expect me to be all calm and rational and apologize. I won't be over it in 10 days, let alone 10 minutes and, after all this time, these people should know that. What part of "leave me the fuck alone so I can get this mountain of work done" wasn't clear the first 5 times I told them? Expect on time 6 to get a new asshole chewed! If you don't respect me, how in the hell do you expect me to respect you by being civil?
On the diet front, I also really haven't lost any more weight in the past couple of weeks, but we've had all kinds of food events at work and I still haven't had the time to exercise. Come hell or high water tho, tomorrow I'm gettin on the bloody treadmill!!
On the International Hermit And Stitch weekend front...gosh am I completely ashamed! I stitched through about two episodes of Downton Abbey tonight and that's all! It's definitely my worst IHSW yet. But when you are working on a project you're not really into (especially one you have already done once), it's hard to keep at it. I'd like to say I accomplished a ton of other stuff instead, but that would be a lie. I played apps all day Saturday while finishing up series 3 of the Vampire Diaries, and today T and I went and saw Nemo in 3-D. But here is the sad fruits of my non-productive labor:
As far as my Tusal goes, I can't remember what last month's looked like, so if this one was different, I would be surprised. But here it is anyway, placed on the free framed pin set I got from buying a Disney gift card:
I have managed to get caught up on everyone's blogs (although I didn't post comments because I have been reading for several hours and I'm a pooped pup). These new work hours suck! Normally this time of night I'd normally still be at work, only to come home in a couple of hours and stitch like crazy till the sun came up. Now, I'm nodding off as I'm typing. How people get up in the morning to go to work will always baffle me. Give me a night shift anytime!
And that's about it for now! I am determined to start my new Disney OCD planning series next week (along with my own preparations for my October trip, which I am ashamedly behind on). We'll see how it all goes! Let's just hope I managed to make enough people hate me last week that I'm finally left alone this week! Hate is an emotion they can throw at me all day long, I can just put up the walls and shut them down completely. It's the easiest energy to block (love being the hardest). They are just spoiling their own vibe by filling it with useless negativity.
Comments
Good stress is good.... maybe you can get into kind of a groove with this new job that the stress level will keep dropping?
I didn't have that great an IHSW weekend either... :S