Dear Ms. Life,
Thank you for accepting my apology (probably only temporarily, but I'm grateful, nonetheless). Turns out the leak that flooded my office was only a busted water pipe instead of a cracked foundation, so I should only be out of my office for a bit more than a week versus the original quote of 3-5. Plus, and here's the big bonus, the docs said I could paint my office and didn't say no when I said purple! Maybe they weren't taking me seriously, but I'm going out first thing Monday morning to get the Disney paint samples before they figure it out!
Oh, and BTW, I'm assuming you got my new list of "those that truly deserve your rath" and I hope they provide you with enough ammunition to torture them for many years to come! You're welcome!