Tuesday, October 25, 2016

Stitch Stash Page Clean Up

I cleaned up my Stitch Stash page because, although I haven't been stitching much, I have been buying Stash like mad, especially from Neni Designs! I figured it would be better to just create albums for each stash versus trying to post all the hundreds of pictures.

Each stash can be found here:

Neni Designs
HAED Charts
Etsy and other online charts
Kit/Pattern Stash

I didn't make a page for my self-made patterns simply because I change my mind too much on those and I haven't ever even considered stitching one yet. Maybe someday I'll post those again, but just not now.

Sunday, October 23, 2016

Well...

Another week passed and I did stitch...but only twice. I left off here:
Stitch042
and made it here:
Stitch044
It was pretty nice to see Scrump start to appear, but I did come to a realization...I've always stitched to relax or to get over a bad day and now that I take medicine for that, it almost makes stitching seem like work instead of therapy. I've got to find a way to get back to "normal" stitching self and I've got to find a way to do it on meds. Ugh.

Sunday, October 16, 2016

I STITCHED!

Yep, you read that right, I actually stitched today! Granted, it wasn't much, but at least it was a start. I left off on Lilo and Stitch Otherwise back on July 30th (I can't believe it's been that long!):
Stitch041
And I made it here today:
Stitch042
I just had to do something other than stare at the "lost house". They warned me that the Ritalin would make my OCD worse, but since I've never seen OCD as crutch, I couldn't imagine how. Now I know.

I'm trying really hard to let it go (don't sing it)...all I've been able to do is look at other houses that I could never ever afford and make myself sick trying to figure out a way to get one. The therapist told me I didn't need to come back unless I felt the need, and as much as I hate to admit it, I need. Guess I'll have to make a phone call come Monday morning.

Sunday, October 9, 2016

Stark reminder of that cardinal sin I committed in the womb...

I'd like to say I stitched this week, but I didn't. Despite being on anti-depressants again, certain things can happen to cause me to shrink back into my shell and shut down completely. This week, I received the biggest kick in the teeth I've had so far this year.

Last Wednesday was just a regular sucky work day and I decided to stop at the store on my way home. I ended up making a couple more stops and came home a way I rarely ever do. I passed a realty office that had one of those digital displays and, while I was stuck at a red light, I was watching the screen when something amazing happened...a house, on a street directly behind my parents, popped up for $80,000. Houses in that neighborhood usually go for about $150. Keep in mind, we live in Arkansas, so the cost of living is really low and $150,000 is a LOT of house.

I got super-excited and called my Mother immediately. She, of course, knew nothing about it, so I decided to check the web the instant I got home and, despite checking all the local realty sites (including the office with the sign), I could not find that house to save my life. Well, I figured it wasn't meant to be because, with all my credit card debt and what I still owe on my trailer (and my meager salary), I couldn't even afford an $80,000 house. Besides, I vowed when I was a kid that I would never move back to that town again and, even though the town I live in now has gotten worse and worse, maybe it was a good thing. At least I was trying to justify it in my mind.

The next morning, on the way to work, I had an epiphany and decided to check Zillow. They are usually either way behind on the listings or way ahead, and I was hoping it might be there. Sure enough, it took me all of 2 seconds to find the house. It was perfect! It needed work (apparently the previous owner liked to punch holes in the wall), but it was literally adjacently located behind my parents house! It was a repossessed house (hence the price point) and had only been on the market for a few days. I started making phone calls immediately. Of course, everyone I tried to call was out, but I left messages everywhere and spent the entire morning staring at my possible future "real" house!

Being that close to my parents means free lawn care, free pup-sitting and, most of all, free dinners whenever I wanted them! I would be in a MUCH safer area than I'm in now and, despite the longer commute to work (and the extra wear and tear on my vehicle), it would still be worth it. The house was a little over 1800 square feet, so plenty of room for ALL the Disney stuff to be in ONE room instead of spread out everywhere! But, the creme de la creme was the fact that it had a DOGGY DOOR! Seriously folks, Bam would have his own little door that would lead to his own yard!

I wrangled figures left and right...added up all my credit card debt as well as the balance on my trailer (which would have to be added to the figures), I added in money for repairs and new things I would need, and even went a bit above (just in case) and decided that I would need a 30-year mortgage for $140 to cover everything, but I could still swing the payments if I had no trailer payment, lot rent, and credit card bills.

My Brother-In-Law, who just happened to be in a bank president meeting at the time (what are the odds and I knew at that point it must be fate), promised he'd call me as soon as his meeting was over with and, considering he would be my best hope for getting the house in the first place, his was the call I was waiting on the most. But my Sister called me first, and as I was relaying my excitement, she dropped a bomb on me...Matt's brother may have just bought my house. I tried not to let it get me down, I mean seriously, what are the odds that the absolute PERFECT house for me would be bought my my Brother-In-Law's brother? But I still had hope and I wasted the better part of the morning browsing for new furniture online.

By the time Matt called me back, he confirmed my worst fears, his brother had just signed the papers on the house...the brother with the extremely checkered past who, up until about two years ago, they had to keep constant restraining orders on every time he got out of jail. This man had MY house!

I cried like I haven't cried in years. I was literally handed the perfect house on a silver platter only to have it jerked away from me almost instantly. Of course, my Sister and Brother-In-Law being the amazing people that they are vowed to help me find something else, but I was given yet another reminder of my horrible luck (because apparently I can't remember all the other times I've been slapped in the face by fate). There was no way another house within that close of a vicinity of my parents and at that price point would ever come available again (the house right beside them is currently being sold for $154 and that would be WAY out of my budget).

I'd like to say, after a couple of days I've been able to let it go (because honestly, there is nothing I can do about it now), but my OCD won't let that happen, if anything, I've only been obsessing about it more. Even though the listing has now been pulled from Zillow, I saved the pictures and have been looking at them constantly. I would have never seen that sign in the first place had a series of random events not led me down that road. Then, to find out the house's location, to find out my Brother-In-Law was at the bank at the time I needed to talk to him, I mean, COME ON! I HATE MY LIFE! Who could stitch at a time like this?