One of the weirdest things about being an Asper is how much control I give to my emotions despite the screaming of my logical brain at my idiocy...I am quite aware of how I should be reacting to situations, but knowing and doing are always two separate things in my world. Nine times out of ten, this is why I end up with headaches and it's why I've had a headache since last Friday. My work issues aren't because of me or anything I'm doing, it's because I'm allowing another person to expose and manipulate my insecurities...my brain knows this, my emotions see finger-pointing and stares from people who aren't even involved in the situation and, unfortunately, emotions trump logic every single time.
Last night, I stopped by the drug store to refill my meds and then to get Chinese food (I'm weird that way too, caffeine, MSG, chocolate, all the things you are not supposed to eat when you have a migraine tend to clear mine up). On the way home, I turned on the radio (meaning my iPod...I'm too old to get what is being played on the radio these days), and three songs played in succession. First up:
Perfect example of the state I'm in now. Next came:
Suddenly, my head started winning the war and I was just thinking how grateful I am to have my boys when the penultimate song came on:
And just like that, all my work problems were put into perspective and my headache started to wain, even before eating the Chinese. Today, I'm not completely headache free, but I'm in a much better state of mind.
This year we've lost a lot of great artists and I know that one day I'll lose one of my boys too, but for now, I am so grateful that I have them and have had for 35 years of my life (and here's to 35 more years). 2017 WILL be different because I will make it so with the help of four guys from Birmingham.
As to the backstabbers at work: